I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought I was riding a bike, but I guess it was a vacuum cleaner