Tap Here to view the Mobile Optimized TFLN
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Follow @tfln
Cracked IndieClick Humor