I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
he just looked at me and whispered "these are my sea lions. my sea lions." and then went back to licking the mirror
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow