Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.