I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
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I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
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put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
you will always have a special place in my vag