I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.