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saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
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