So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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