There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Randomize
