No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.