goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
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