how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Randomize