I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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