ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Drake has all the answers
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize
