if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
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You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
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My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Those nachos came to me in a dream
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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