Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
