I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
