Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
Randomize