speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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