The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
