Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
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