You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Randomize
