all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
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