Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
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