I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
Randomize
