I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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