no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
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