marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Randomize
