The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
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