i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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