He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
