i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
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