Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
