Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
