I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
