is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Randomize
