i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
