I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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