you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
