It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
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