why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
