I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
COCAINE IS GR8
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