She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Randomize
