I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
