After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Beer is acceptable at 830am if it's your bday, right?
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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