She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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