I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
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