He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
