Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
I'd like to apologize to your liver. It sees how much beer i drink and gets jealous of how awesome my liver is.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
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