I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Just invented taco cereal.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
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